Well, I have never been much of a poet myself though many of my friends have come with their brilliant pieces. The reason for this I believe, lies in the type of poems I like i.e. ones with a good rhyme scheme. This poem here will be in contention for the universes worst poetry ever and will warrant a revision of the entry for the same in a future edition of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy which would normally run as:
“Vogon poetry is of course the third worst in the Universe.
The second worst is that of the Azagoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem “Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning” four of his audience died of internal haemorrhaging, and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been “disappointed” by the poem’s reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his twelve book epic entitled “My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles” when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save life and civilization, leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England in the destruction …”
So here goes nothing:
Awake at 3oclock in the morning,
Coz something stupid went into my eye.
And this line is just here coz,
I found a rhyming word in ‘why’.
Rhyming words are what I never seem to have,
So I will put in “Bye, Bye Miss American Pie”
And because I love reading Agatha Christie,
I will put in “A pocketful of Rye”.
So, on this fateful and sleepless night,
as GRE words doing am I,
But Yoda would say “GRE words doing I am”
How did I think about him and I wonder why?
Was it then a coincidence yesterday,
that I should come across a lullaby,
Written by an Android, Paranoid he may be.
‘&’ that I heard “Zaphod just this guy…?
Was it also a coincidence then,
That I came across a pie chart of pie?
Or that I could answer a quiz question,
Concerning both Isaac Asimov and Helen of Troy?
Now as I look out of the window,
Into the not so dark and not so starry sky,
Never have I thought so many rhyming words,
How did I think about them and I wonder why?
Doesn’t any poet find rhyming words difficult,
Or to everyone do they easily come by?
And do they have choice to make,
Whether to rhyme with “bee” or with “buy”?
And perhaps I am inspired to write this,
After reading the blog of this limerick loving guy,
And/or after reading this short poem by another friend,
Who gave a lecture, which introduced me to the cricketer CB Fry.
Rhyming words I have thought of many,
They include dry, my, cry, try, die, lie, even fungi and rabbi,
How to put them into lines,
I will think, till then BBYE!
Now I will put down my pen,
The magnum opus complete and the mind rested.
I don’t think I will write again soon,
Till I have so much time to be invested.
